Newly converted muslim men and dating introductory email dating site

A convert needs to select a wali that she is confident can understand her background, has the time to dedicate to the process, and one that is open to sufficient communication.

Obviously the best arrangement would be a man who is born and raised in her country, and one whose wife she can openly speak to and is also willing to be involved and act as a middle-man.

What she really needs is the support of good friends and time to sort out her problems.

Lastly, there are many women who convert because of boyfriends that, by American standards, seem like they are religious guys, but as she becomes genuinely interested in following the deen, she realizes this guy is barely practicing.

I asked a very large pool of convert women of mixed races to tell me what mistakes they made and lessons they learned when seeking marriage.

For this reason many of them feel an especially strong need to satisfy their sexual desires.

Intercultural marriages will come up next, but firstly a Muslimah needs time to “find herself” as a Muslim, to learn about her deen and grow into it before she selects a lifelong partner.

While we like to pretend there aren’t different stripes of Islam that attract different types of people, in reality there are. One may become attached to a particular madh-hab and yet another may just be content doing the bare minimum. This is reality, and instead of arguing the merits of this group or that, a convert needs time to learn and read and “settle” on what they believe is correct; it’s ultimately what we all do.

One must wonder how a woman who cannot even have a frank discussion about herself with her wali, can expect such a person to really be able to care for her personal interests or find someone compatible?

This discomfort for both parties has led to marriages with glaring conflicts that were arranged too quickly, or some in which the wali did not even speak to the woman except to give her the marriage contract, hoping she found a way learn more about her future husband through other channels.

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This can be an imām, resident scholar, or respected male (usually middle-aged).

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